Learning my purpose

When I was just a wee young freshmen at JMU, I randomly decided to go home one weekend. I caught a ride home from someone on the ride board and spent a awkward 2 hours with this a very...unique girl. But I got home on Friday night and got to hang out with my family and see some old friends who were still in the area.

The Saturday night, I decided to go back to see my old friends at Metro 29 Diner where I used to work, and I hung out there till like 4am which was stupid cause the only time I could get a ride back to school was at 9am the next morning. When I got home I feel asleep right away which at the time was a rarity for me. I used to have insomnia problems back then. But I fell asleep quickly that night, and actually slipped into a vivid dream right away.

It was a very long and convoluted dream, but I can still remember it to this day. I was feeling sick one day and went to the doctor. The doctor couldn't figure out what was wrong with me and called all of his doctor friends to come and try to figure out what was wrong. Eventually they figured out that I lymphatic cancer, and I would die. But they couldn't tell me when. In fact they said I probably would live a long life without pain, there was just no way of knowing.

They said I could leave and go on my way and live this unknown life, or there was a new treatment involving cryogenic freezing I could try. I asked about that of course, and here is what they told me. They would take me away to the facilities and I could go into the cryogenic container and be frozen, and I would stay there for all eturnity, never to be unfrozen , never to be cured. Oh, and I would have to make my decision right then, and would not be able to say goodbye to any family or friends.

I said, lets go.

Since the doctors had spent so long diagnosing me, I arrived at the facility half way through the instructions about how to put on the special suit, and remove all jewelry. I was the 9 person in line to be frozen that day, and I watched the first person step into the container, get sealed in, then see it fill up with a liquid. There was a little window on the front of the container to watch the person, and as the first person swam in the liquid before it was frozen, you could see his face blindly happy. As the happy dude waved to the rest of us, the liquid was frozen instantly, and right when it happened, the room we were in went completely silent, and became this white space full of light.

The other people were there, but at the same time I was all alone. Then I heard a voice that said "Kevin, it is not your time to die. You must live. You must love. And you must teach others to love."

I instantly woke up sweating and crying, cold and hot at the same time. But I wasn't scared. For the first time in a while, I felt at peace.

That was when I learned why I am here, why I exist and what I need to do with my life. It began my quest to understand love, and has lead me to believe that love is the meaning of life, the reason we exist, and the source of all joy. And I am a teacher of love.